7) Your dream wedding
Well, this might be a downer to some. However, over the last year or so I've started to think that marriage may not be the wisest idea, at least not for me. I haven't exactly been inspired to become legally bound to someone. My parents divorce and my dad's most recent divorce have shown me just how ugly split ups within marital binds can be.
"Well you're supposed to be married forever" Lol well yeah that's how it's supposed to work, but it doesn't always work out that way.
I think what I want is to find a nice guy who I'm head over heels for, live with him, and just build our life without the legal paper work of the state saying "these people are married". No lawyers would have to be involved if it didn't work out-- whether it was irreconcilable differences or abusive, I don't want to go through a long-ass court process to get out of a marriage.
It can be 'like' we're married, and it's not as if I'd love him any less. It's just that if shit hits the fan and it cannot be fixed, then we should just be able to get up and leave.
It's not that I would go out and cheat on the guy. It's just that, if I need to leave for some inconceivable reason, then I can. I have a fear of feeling trapped, and maybe that's what scares me so much about marriage. For all I know this could link back to my parents' divorce in that I felt 'trapped' in a rotten situation and had no way out.
THAT ASIDE. I also kinda don't want a wedding because things hardly ever go the way I want them to. Knowing my luck, I'd have this nice wedding all planned out and somehow shit would hit the fan, and I'd become bride-zilla and I DON'T want to become bride-zilla because bride-zillas disgust me.
Ideally: Outdoor wedding on a nice sunny day, with friends and family, and everyone being civil and nice to each other.
Which is why I want to just go straight to the court house and get papers signed if I ever did decide to get married.
I'm a party pooper.
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